Story:It wasn't what she said--it was how she said it--framing her words with a hint of embarrassment.
Following a casual inquiry about her weekend, a friend was almost apologetic as she described a lazy Saturday when "nothing got done." She went on to mention a movie she had watched and a book she had gotten a good start on. She described a new recipe she had tried since she's looking for something to wow her family at an upcoming gathering. As I listened to her I wondered, "Since when did baking, reading and enjoying a movie get considered 'nothing'?"
I was reading a travel guide a while back in preparation for a holiday when I came across the story of a father who admitted to being so concerned with planning the perfect vacation he forgot about the people he was planning it for. Since the trip was costing a tremendous amount of money he was determined they were going to get their money's worth by scheduling as much activity and entertainment into each day as possible. By day four they were exhausted and short-tempered and, despite the idyllic setting in which they found themselves, the family was miserable. The morning of day five started with dad setting aside the schedule and telling the kids to find their swimsuits. Although they could have easily sat by the pool in their home city, the day they spent in the water at the resort was a family favourite because they were together, they were relaxed and and they were having fun. Others may have been skeptical--but he considered it time (and money) very well spent.
Time runs at the same pace for all of us but how we use that time says a lot about our perceptions of it. We use phrases indicating "time is of the essence", "time flies", and we admonish ourselves and others to "make good use of time since you only live once." There are more than a few grains of truth to those statements but finding middle ground between sensing its urgency while recognizing its preciousness requires a broader definition of what it means to make good use of time.
Since we can't add more minutes to the clock, our job is to pay attention to those minutes that methodically tick away--not with regret or alarm, but realistically and authentically. Is cramming more into those moments the answer, or would we be better to pack in less activity and allow for a more reflective appreciation of those moments? It doesn't mean we can't be busy, but we shouldn't make busyness the goal in itself; as if the busier we are the greater our value must be. In the same way, approaching a season, a day or single block of time and allowing ourselves to break free of activity shouldn't be seen as lazy or unproductive. Far from it.
The human brain and our bodies require rest, crave quiet, and demand downtime. It is a physiological imperative, but one that is finding increasing competition with the cultural condition that puts us in states of incessant activity and unrelenting routine. We try to equate the fullness of our schedules with fulfillment in ourselves, but the two don't necessarily correlate.
In the midst of keeping up with the kids, the grandkids, the office, the business, the committees, the house, the yard, the church, the clubs, the volunteer work and that list that fills as quickly as items are crossed off, we need to remind ourselves we can better fulfill all these obligations only when we have the energy, the motivation and the strength to do so. But that is the key. It means taking time to pursue the things that fill us up, renew us and get us going again.
Somake timeto sit, to be still, to pray, to think and to reflect. Andtake timeto read, to bake, to sew, draw, run, sculpt, and build and so on--and do it without apology.
We should never feel we have to explain or justify the spending of a day doing that which taps into our hearts and inspires our souls.That's my outlook.
