I realized the other day that I get uncomfortable when people make jokes about same sex couples.
My realization actually came up a few times recently including an instance where a woman was hit on by another girl and the story was being told to me as something quite funny. I listened, strained a smile, and gave them a laugh or two, but really I was shaking my head a little on the inside.
The one that was hit on felt it was necessary to continually defend herself as the story was being told, that she was definitely not into women and liked men. Why was this something that seemed to matter so much?
The other situation involved people joking about finding me a boyfriend here, followed by a comment of maybe I'd rather a girl, because they had been joking about the topic earlier. To which my answer was a smile followed by a "No, you can find me a boyfriend." But, had they kept on about it, I likely wouldn't have responded further, it's not something I feel I should defend myself against.
In my books it just doesn't need defending, people can think whatever they want unless it's something more serious like murder. If someone falsely accused me of murder, then I would absolutely defend myself to my last breath.
But, I've often wondered, after I've been asked about my preferences the couple times I have been, whether seriously or jokingly, how people's views of me would change if I had answered, "Yes." Does something like that really matter to people or can they see past that to the person and their actions denoting who they are at the core?
I know I don't know all of you personally that read this, but if you do read my writing each week I'm sure you have formed an idea in your head about what I'm like and for those who do know me, would something like that have changed your opinion of me? Even just my comments here might as I've headed to left field, but you're entitled to your opinions.
Before I unknowingly made friends who were gay, I used to join in on jokes, and likely that's why they had a difficult time telling me because those jokes made them worry about our friendship and what I would think of them when they eventually told me about their relationship.
I never really thought it through when I was younger which is why the joking was fine, but now when I hear them and hear people adamantly defend themselves against being a gay I'm actually a little bit bothered by it because I think of my friends.
I would never become angry with people for their jokes, but my smile was strained when everyone was laughing about how the one woman had been hit on. It just wasn't as funny to me as it seemed to be for everyone else there.
Many people aren't okay with same sex relationships and that's fine. I understand everyone has their own viewpoints and everyone is entitled to their own thoughts, whether it's based on religious beliefs or just finding it "not normal," it's an opinion, just like this is my opinion.
Personally I just find it a little difficult to listen to these jokes because the two people I know, who were happily married last year, are two of the greatest people I have in my life and I am honoured to call them my friends. After all they're the only friends I have who have travelled nine hours to visit me for a long weekend in Carlyle. It was even a long weekend where I was working so had to drag them to random events with me, but they never once complained.
If I ever needed anything they would be some of the first ones there for me, "in a heartbeat," as the saying goes because they're simply good people with quality character attributes many should actually strive for in this day and age.
