I am sure we have all been in the position that an issue with someone has arisen and needed to be addressed. Many people would have a conversation with the other party, trying to resolve the situation in a calm manner. There may be moments where the two parties agree to disagree, but somehow come to a resolution to the problem.
There are also people who want to throw the gloves off, screaming and yelling. It is an intimidation tactic, one that does not always work or can blow up in their own face. Most times, those conflict resolution tactics do not work. The other party may not be interested in a yelling match or is one who deals with physical altercations.
What is more disappointing to me than anything else is how we are teaching our youth how to deal with conflict. We as adults are supposed to be positive role models, passing on the knowledge of the hard lessons we had to once learn ourselves. There are times where the lessons we learn don’t always work out the way we want.
For me, an adult conversation should be had between adults. Children should not be involved in any adult problems at any time. We also need to reap what we sow. If we want our children to show respect for others, so must we. Only then can a conflict be resolved without too much tongue-lashing or even violence.
So, how does one break away from such a negative way of dealing with conflict? Maintaining a calm demeanour by taking a few deep breaths helps. Although you may want to pop like a cork, thinking of the words you want to use and refraining from using profanity can be an asset. Putting your hands in your pockets or behind your back may also help.
Going into a situation all heated will likely end poorly, the situation will not be fully resolved, or the problem will progress to a whole new level. Regardless of how we deal with conflict, we can all become better people if we take a few extra moments to think, speak clearly and remain calm.
