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Cyberbullying realities hit home for Outlook students & parents

Presentations at Outlook High School put the spotlight on cyberbullying with talks held by retired cop Brian Trainor.
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Brian Trainor's presentation on cyberbullying was a no-nonsense, facts-as-presented talk on the troubling issue. Photo: Derek Ruttle/The Outlook

OUTLOOK - The hard truths and the sometimes even harsher realities of cyberbullying were laid out and explained to those who listened to retired Sgt. Brian Trainor speak in Outlook last week.

Appearing at Outlook High School on Tuesday, December 12, guest speaker Trainor gave a pair of presentations to students during the school day, with the younger grades seeing a more mild program while the older students were witness to some of the more mature and dangerous scenarios that cyberbullying can present. Finally, a presentation for parents after school let out for the day showed what Trainor spoke with kids about and revealed what parents might find themselves in store for, should the growing problem of cyberbullying begin to affect them.

Trainor, who spent 27 years as a police officer, saw most types of bullying and harassment in his line of work, which helped push him toward educating people such as students, employees, and senior citizens on how to prevent these types of abuse.

Brian's main message to those who witness his presentations is simple - "You don't know." You don't know the specifics about anyone, you don't know their life story, and you don't know the impact that your words or actions may have on them before it may be too late. This point was made to students earlier in the day, which was described as 'eye-opening' by some, and it was reinforced to the older students and to the parents that were gathered.

"That whole idea of 'sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me' is essentially a lie," said Trainor. "Because we all know that in this day and age, words can definitely hurt and leave lasting impressions."

One of Trainor's most important points was the impact that social media can have, not only in the interactions between kids, but a more long-term effect such as what potential employers may see when they do a simple Google search on someone. If images of kids pop up and are obscene or offensive, this of course can have a detrimental effect on their potential work choices in life.

Of course, with social media these days seemingly running the world we live in, it's important for parents to know what's popular with kids. Trainor pointed out that Facebook is comprised mainly of adults as younger generations seem to prefer other services such as Instagram, Snapchat, and Discord. Even more important, Trainor highlighted the fact that these applications are the most-used ones in criminal cases involving sextortion, which is the increasingly-popular practice of acquiring something, usually money, by threatening to expose a victim's nude or explicit photos or videos online.

Cases involving sextortion have become more and more prevalent, as seen in today's more shocking and heartbreaking news headlines. In October out in Prince George, BC, a 12-year old boy named Carson Cleland took his own life after becoming a victim of online sextortion. To date, Cleland's online tormentor hasn't been found, and it's being highlighted by police officials that sextortion is most prevalent in youth between the ages of 13 and 18.

It's said that since 2015, there has been an 825% increase in the making and distribution of child pornography.

As well, Trainor pointed out that 261 teenagers die of suicide in Canada every year.

He also pointed out that you're not invisible online and that texting and messaging activity is kept and logged by providers. For example, SaskTel keeps message logs for up to three months in order to keep them available for any potential police matters that may come up. Stressing the Kids Help Line (686868) and the new 988 number, Brian also advised parents to do a Google Images search on their kids in order to stay up to date on what photos they may be tagged in and to stay alert and updated on their internet usage, asking what certain apps may be, and set privacy settings.

He also pointed out something which may be interesting to parents, an app known as the Calculator Photo Vault, which acts as an app in order to hide texts and images on your kid's Android or iPhone. The fake calculator app not only encourages a child to keep private photos and videos, but it also opens the door for potential online sex chats with strangers.

Brian also pointed out that parents might want to educate themselves on hashtags, which are normally used on Twitter or Instagram. These can be used to send secretive messages online or even display a child's cry for help. They can include such hashtags as:

#420: Pot/weed/drugs.
#ana: Anorexia.
#crow: Marijuana.
#cu46: "See you for sex"
#deb: Depression.
#ednos: "Eating disorder not otherwise specified"
#mia: Bulimia.
#molly: MDMA or ecstasy.

Trainor said that it's important for parents to look for signs of stress in their kids, and even look for signs of suicide. Talking about the problem and facing the issues that kids are battling these days head-on can help provide a release, and he also noted the positives that medication such as anti-depressants can provide, which Brian himself is taking.

Trainor is the author of two books, 'Bully 4 U' and 'Stop Fraud: A Veteran Police Investigator Tells You How', and his website is available at briantrainor.ca.

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